Xena: Warrior Princess Episode 2.14: “A Necessary Evil”

[chavalah.livejournal.com]

Brace yourself, it’s a Callisto episode, so Hudson Leick automatically steals the show. :P She’s so awesome that “Hercules” borrowed her a few weeks ago, and she has definitely moved beyond languishing in Tartarus. Callisto has bigger things to do than just stay anonymously dead. :P

Granted, the main storyline is a little silly (there’s no way that I can deny, in this episode, that Velesca is a one-note bully.) But when it came to Callisto and our two girls, things were pretty deep and moving. Quite impressive, especially since this was another episode that was hastily written to cover Lucy’s injury. But yeah, when it comes to Callisto’s backstory, Hudson just brings it. Then the others follow suit.

Summary is here, courtesy of whoosh.org.


So let’s go ahead and start with the Amazons. A prominent feature of the last episode, we now have to quickly dissociate Gabrielle from her queendom, now that Xena is back. :P Of course, the title goes to the only recognizable face—Ephiny—but she only holds it in Gabby’s place, ensuring that this plotline is around if needed in the future. Never quite know when a cast accident might require it! ;) Plus, it’s cool for Gabs to have her own fallback subplot. Anywho, beyond an attempt to delay Velasca, who is now a fledging god hellbent on revenge against Gabrielle, they pretty much exit stage left.

I still hold that maaaaybe Velasca could’ve been an interesting villain last ep, but this time around, besides for stumbling into the Amazon camp, half dead but determined, she was utterly ridiculous. Even her old followers turned on her. Honestly, how many iterations of “you can’t hide from me Gabrielle!” and “I’m a god!” did she have to go through? :P Granted, she had a funny line with the guard she killed at Artemis’s temple (who, by the way, might’ve been more closely associated with the Amazons, but wasn’t the only god they would’ve prayed to.) At least she was consistent with calling herself “the god of chaos” then turning into a tornado. :P

And Callisto is in a different place than last we left her on “Xena”! I’m not too interested in rewatching old “Hercules” episodes, but luckily the wiki will help me surmise the episode “Surprise”: Hera comes to Tartarus and promises Callisto immortality if she kills Herc. Our villain then spikes many of his family and friends with a hallucinatory poison, and ergo convinces the demigod to accompany her to the Tree of Life in the Labyrinth of Gods (the place where Xena later goes to get her.) Hercules is ultimately able to grab some fruit and trap her there, but not before she eats some herself, making her immortal. Meanwhile, Herc must’ve told Xena about this off camera. :P So when our girls get to Callisto, she’s busy having a creepy conversation with a rat while threatening to have her revenge.

Callisto may be a driven young woman, but Xena has some tricks of her own up her sleeve. Obviously she tempts her enemy into helping her by dangling the ambrosia—because if there’s one step up from immortality, it’s deity. But Xena also anticipated beforehand that Callisto would turn on them—and she knew just the right buttons to press with Velasca in that situation to make sure that the two of them would remain at each other’s throats. Brilliant. Xena’s plan is, of course, to try and enslave both of them in a nearby lava pit, but who knows if that’ll be enough to hold them? (Well, Callisto is too awesome, anyway. Velasca…not so much. But it was cool to watch the fledging god slowly start to extract herself from a huge rock fall.)

Undoubtedly the most powerful part of this episode was the continued emotional stalemate between Xena and Callisto. In exchange for her help, Callisto forced Xena to admit to a nearby village that she had once butchered the town Sira and destroyed the life that this young girl deserved. Sure, the wind blowing in Callisto’s face was a bit extreme, but gah, her FACE. Callisto is the ultimate example of a person who cannot move forward in life because she’s completely paralyzed by a traumatic event. She says as much to Gabrielle, speaking candidly by the camp fire about how she can’t feel anything anymore (before turning this touching moment into a chance to hurt Gabs over Perdicas’s death. Which, by the way, I appreciated the show bringing up for Gabby’s own backstory. Continuity is always our friend, and it makes for stronger characters.) Xena’s an interesting case, too, because although she feels guilt over what she did to Callisto in the past, she’s absolutely certain that this dangerous immortal/god warlord is incapable of feeling guilt herself. Gabrielle ultimately comes to the conclusion that Callisto must feel a little guilt, because if she doesn’t believe that and can’t forgive her husband’s murderer, then she can’t move on. At least one of these three ladies is attempting to do so. :P

I enjoyed the visual effects and pyrotechnics of this episode, just saying. :P Also, Xena healing her dislocated shoulder by smashing it into a cave wall? Classic awesome. :P Though oOnce again I have to curse Iolaus for not staying with Gabrielle last ep, because this ep they really needed Hercules to help fight Velasca! (Though thanks to the wiki again, I’ve learned that the “Hercules” episode that aired the same night featured that hero briefly losing his super-strength, so.) Anywho, Iolaus might’ve left the building, but it seems that actor Michael Hurst is still around! His forthcoming “Xena” role will be as director for next week’s episode, hee. Time for some good, ol’-fashioned comedy.

Disclaimer: The reputation of the Amazon Nation was not harmed despite Velasca's overly radical adherence to an otherwise valid belief system.

Favorite Quotes:

*Xena and Gabrielle compare titles*
Gabrielle: Queen Gabrielle. Hmm. Does an Amazon Queen beat a Warrior Princess?

Xena: Do you really wanna find out?


*Ephiny isn’t impressed by her new queen’s sense of humor*
Gabrielle: All right. Just don’t expect me to show up at any parades or anything.

Ephiny: Amazons don’t have parades.

Gabrielle: That was a joke.

Ephiny: I know.


*a common refrain throughout the rest of the episode*
Velasca: You can’t hide from me, Gabrielle! You can’t hide from a god!


*Xena, the self-made surgeon*
Ephiny: Xena-- that arm’s dislocated.

Xena: Ah, yeah. *smashes shoulder into wall* All better now.


*Callisto’s villain monologue to the rat*
Callisto: No, no, no-- no, no. Relax, my furry little friend. No, you’re not dinner. That’s the boring part about immortality. You’re never hungry. No, you’re definitely not food. You’re my little Hercules. Hercules trapped me in this little resort-- and I owe him a lot. And I’m planning on paying him back for his kindness. Soon-- soon. So--run away like a good little Hercules. Run away. Run away. Very soon.


*Xena turns the villain monologue into a dialogue*
Callisto: Oh, Xena-- so glad you could stop by for a little visit. And here I was-- huh-huh-- afraid I’d never get to torture you again. As you can see-- I’ve been keeping busy-- scarred by fire, entombed for eternity. You’ll, ah-you’ll forgive me if I’m not exactly at my peak-- won’t you?

Xena: Callisto, I didn’t come here for this.

Callisto: Well, then-- you shouldn’t have come at all.

Xena: You may be immortal, but I can still do damage. How’d you like to spend eternity in five pieces?


*the bullying begins*
Gabrielle: You’re here. It wasn’t my idea.

Callisto: Oh, no, no, of course not. How’ve you been? Any new husbands since the last one I killed?


*Xena’s admission to the town*
Xena: My name is Xena. Some call me the Warrior Princess. Some call me ‘murderer.’” Many years ago, there was a village called Cirra. It was a village just like yours-- small and—and prosperous-- full of life-- until a day that my army came. Until the day that I came-- destroyed it. Under my orders, my men-- they sacked the village; burned the houses; and killed every living thing. Everything was destroyed-- including the soul of one young, innocent girl-- who will never be able to reclaim her childhood-- and will never know what the Fates had planned for her if not for me.


*Velasca makes a stand against Artemis*
Velasca: *to guard* But you-- remember what you see here. Remember that you met Velasca, the god of Chaos. Remember what she did and said-- in the temple of the Amazon goddess. *to Artemis* Artemis, you fake! Where were you when our nation died?! Where were you when the many Amazon tribes were scattered and destroyed?! Where were you when the word ‘Amazon’ became a joke told by old men in taverns?! I was once your subject. Now, I’m your equal—and your enemy! *destroys temple, then destroys guard when he runs* He wouldn’t have told it right, anyway.


*Velasca makes an enemy out of Callisto*
Callisto: You don’t just kill me and walk away.


*Callisto and Gabrielle’s campfire game*
Callisto: Let’s play a game, shall we? I’ll answer your question—if you answer mine.

Gabrielle: All right.

Callisto: What did I feel-- when Xena confessed her crimes? Well the problem is, Gabrielle-- I never feel anything. I mean, bits and pieces, here and there, but nothing solid. Think back to when you were a little girl-- and all you knew-- was your mother—and your sister. And all of your faith revolved them. Now, kill them. My turn.

Gabrielle: What?

Callisto: When I sliced open your husband, how long did it take him to die?

Xena: There’s a path out of the mountains--. *Gabs runs off* What’s wrong with her?

Callisto: We played a game of truth or dare, and she’s not very good at it.


*Callisto’s villain monologue to Xena*
Callisto: Wish me luck-- not that you would. Oh, and Xena--the next time we meet-- I’ll be a god.



*Velasca’s villain monologue to Gabrielle*
Velasca: There you are, Gabrielle. Uh-- go away. Now-- here we are at last, face-to-face. Do you fear me, Gabrielle?

Gabrielle: Yes-- I don’t wanna die.

Velasca: Hmm-- well, at least you admit it. Strange, but I don’t really wanna kill you.

Gabrielle: Go with it.

Velasca: Oh, ho-ho-ho-ho. I’m going to kill you all right. There’s just this part of me that respects you, because you did me a huge favor. The Amazon nation is dead. I’ve been trying to revive a corpse. But now, as a god-- I can make the world into whatever I choose. And now it’s time for you to die. Oh, it’s too easy to kill you as a god-- and not half as satisfying as doing it the old-fashioned way. Tell Hades, I’ll be dropping by soon.


*concerning Callisto*
Velasca: Ah-- she’s gotta go.


*Gabrielle moves on from how Callisto wronged her*
Gabrielle: Xena-- do you think that, deep down, Callisto feels sorry for the things that she’s done?

Xena: No!

Gabrielle: I do. I have to or I can’t forgive her. And if I can’t forgive her, I can’t move on. Goodbye, Callisto.

___